Bedeviled

Bedeviled

...by my so-called moral life.

I am bedeviled
by the idea of too much,
as others must be
by too little.

I crave balance
between needs and wants,
as I cling to the razor's edge,
so close and always ready
to peel away the flesh veneer
on my so-called moral life.

How can I convince you
of my overwhelming thirst
when you see me drowning
in a sea of human bounty?

I already know -
I have too much.

I already know -
I do too much.

I already know -
I can't live perfectly.

And I already know -
it's okay not to know.

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Action is at bottom a swinging and flailing
of the arms to regain one's balance and keep afloat.
~ Eric Hoffer

I balanced all, brought all to mind,
The years to come seemed waste of breath,
A waste of breath the years behind
In balance with this life, this death.
~ William Butler Yeats
(from "An Irish Airman foresees his Death")

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